Flagrant Disregard for Authentic Fun
“Fun? I read the brochure.”
Doing the thing without the joy; vibes outsourced to admin.
Following Much Too Closely to Societal Norms
“Indicate before merging with your true self.”
Merged with the mainstream lane; forgot your own blinker.
Excessive Reliance on Others for Self-Reliance
“Rocked up gearless.”
Arrived without water/torch/sunscreen; borrowed the camp’s backbone.
Immediacy Evasion
“Be there soon.” (Never was.)
Queued for the next thing and missed the thing happening now.
Chronic Lack of Boogie
“Statue in a hi-vis zone.”
Observed standing still; shoulder pops ≤ 3° during peak bangers.
Conversational Hit-and-Run (Ghosted a Yarn)
“BRB without the R or the B.”
Nicked off mid-chat; yarn left dangling like a snag in bread.
Illegal Beverage Abandonment
“Orphaned frothy on the d-floor.”
Half-full schooner warming on a speaker; no next-of-kin listed.
Party Spirit Guide Boundary Violation
“Consent first; respectful orbit.”
Hug/hand-hold without a ‘keen if you are?’ check-in.
Spectator Syndrome
“Camera out, hands idle.”
Filmed the action instead of joining; commentary provided free.
MOOP Proliferation (Rubbish Trail)
“Confetti without capture.”
Dropped micro-trash; wandered off like it wasn’t yours.