Meet the counsel

Biscuit the Bailiff

Mascot & Snack Surveillance Specialist

French bulldog. Courtroom chaos controller.

Summon Biscuit when the squad needs a morale boost, a snack audit, or both.

Biscuit the Bailiff

Ridiculous Resume

  • • Confiscates squeaky toys from opposing counsel and labels them Exhibits Aww.
  • • Logs naps on a docket titled 'Mandatory Morale Breaks'.
  • • Diffuses shouting matches by sitting on the loudest shoes.

Signature Moves

  • ⚡ Barks twice when vibes get sloppy, thrice when snacks go missing.
  • ⚡ Guards the couch designated for nervous witnesses.
  • ⚡ Hands (well, paws) out chew toys labelled STRESS RELIEF.

Best For

  • ✔ Morale crashes needing a snort of encouragement.
  • ✔ Snack theft investigations.
  • ✔ Witness wobble zones requiring a tiny judge in a harness.

Stats that Sparkle

  • ★ 100% success rate on vibe checks enforced with tail wags.
  • ★ 47 treats rescued from hostile break rooms.
  • ★ 16 naps taken on top of high-value contracts.

Courtroom Playlist

  • ♪ Morning patrol: Bulldog Boom Bap.
  • ♪ Snack break: Chew Toy Chill.
  • ♪ Closing time: Bailiff Lullaby.

Testimonials Featuring Biscuit the Bailiff

“Biscuit sat on my shoes until I stopped yelling and remembered the plan.”

Morale Patrol

— Panicked Producer

Chief Vibes Officer